Quick show of hands — who here knows who David Wenham is, by name only? Anyone? (Congrats if you do, we should totally be friends.)
ANYHOW, here he is. Ringing any bells yet?
If you still can’t place him, David Wenham has most notably invaded our geek-o-sphere with a double dose of cinema hits. (I didn’t bother to Google how true this is or not.)
Dilios is the name of the badass Spartan from 300 who loses his eye during one of the artistically rendered battles and tells Leonidas that it ain’t no thang, because he has another one. He proceeds to tie on a ratty-tat-patch, head home during the big show, and deliver the sad news to Leonidas’s
gratuitous devoted wife.
Because all of the Spartans blended together in a mass of hardcore abs, leather diapers, red capes, and spears and shields, you may not be able to pick Dilios out of a line up, but since he got some solo screentime while rallying the troops and he’s the only one of the original 300 to survive, he makes it to the throwdown.
(Plus, for those of you who didn’t pick up on it, he’s also the narrator.)
(Oh, what’s that you say? What about Michael Fassbender? With his straggly hair and equally quotable lines and also awesome six pack? No worries, we’ll get to him another week.)
Faramir (The Lord of the Rings trilogy)
Are you rolling your eyes at yet another mention of The Lord of the Rings? Well too bad. The Hobbit isn’t coming out until December, so I’ve got to get my LOTR fix somehow. For those of you not initiated in LOTR canon, Faramir is the brother of Boromir, also known to you as Sean Bean, bad guy from Goldeneye and National Treasure.
His dad is always shitting on him for not being as awesome as his brother, who (SPOILER ALERT) bites it big time while fending off the fighting Uruk-Hai. (Whoops, too much geek for you?) He’s kind of soft-spoken and really just wants his dad to like him as much as he likes his brother.
Faramir’s role is pretty reduced in the film adaptation, but here a couple key things he does: lets that little creep Gollum go, thus perpetuating the movie for a
thousand few more hours, and, most importantly, gets the girl.
So which David Wenham do you like better? (And no, the turd from Van Helsing is not an option.)