Weekly Watch: American Idol – The Count is On

Fellow Idol worshippers, we’re almost there.  I’m not going to bother with the recap of the San Francisco auditions this week because at this point there’s just not that much to say.  The judges are the judges, Idol was ODing on the sob stories this week, and I just can’t deal with being smacked in the face with irrelevant pity parties less than 15 minutes into the show.  The producers, like me, apparently ran out of steam towards the end of the auditions, because the San Francisco auditions felt like someone hastily slapped that episode together during lunch.

(Did you see the Transformer though?  SCORE.)

Hollywood Week, as expected, righted our wandering ship and got us back on track.  I always love Hollywood Week because it gives us a more solid idea of who the producer favorites are.  Throughout the audition rounds, we’ve been exposed to various contestants and their sobworthy back stories, but during Hollywood Week, the producer favorites become clearer, and we can finally get down to business.

Outlandish personalities we were introduced to in the audition rounds may appear again, ensuring that we start to feel some type of emotion towards them – love, hate, disgust, pity, sympathy, derision – the Idol producers aren’t picky.  Just feel something, and be sure to remember the contestants’ names, and be sure to feel something enough so that you tune in every week to see how your favorite (or nemesis) does.

Now that auditions are over, and we’re getting a better picture of the people we’re supposed to care about, the real trainwreckery is upon us.  Until the contestant pool is whittled down to the Top 24 and the competition actually begins, this is really all we have to look forward to, sadly.

Unless of course, we have some fun with it!  Like most reality competition shows, Idol is fraught with its own eyeroll-inducing quirks.  Documenting these quirks, however, can provide for some unparalleled, if slightly geeky, entertainment.  Let’s have fun together.  Virtual drinking game, anyone?

American Idol Counts - Hollywood Week 1

Did I forget any?  SEND THEM TO ME.  (And I’m pretty sure once Hollywood Week is over, you’re going to see the launch of the American Idol Mega-Bet-Fest here at It’s Only Bullets.)

Of Note Last Week
Highlights from last week’s episode:

  • The Transformer. NATCH.
  • Only 327 contestants made it to Hollywood.  About a tenth of them got screen time in the auditions.  That was clearly 8 hours well spent.
  • What would embarrass you more: farting in front of the judges, having that audition shown on TV, or having footage of you in tears over said fart as the episode lead-in?
  • Icky Couple update.  Earlier I posited: Keep them on your radar – the awkward fallout from when one of them goes on and the other one doesn’t is going to be epic. Okay, so it wasn’t epic, but it was good TV.  As predicted, only one of them made it through (the girl), and watching the boyfriend plead and beg for another chance to sing with his “baby” was pathetic. The way the girl visibly wanted nothing to do with his clinging afterwards is the lifeblood of reality TV. I almost felt bad for him.  Almost.  Then I remembered his stupid frolicking, eskimo kiss-laden video montage with his girlfriend.  Then I stopped.

American Idol is on this week on Wednesday, 2/16, and Thursday, 2/17, at 8/7C on Fox.

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