Chuck Lorre, the executive producer of “Two and a Half Men” among other shows, writes a new vanity card to be displayed at the end of each episode of his shows where most shows simply display a graphic for their production company. Take this week’s vanity card as Lorre’s response to Charlie Sheen’s Monday morning chat with Dan Patrick on his radio show:
CHUCK LORRE PRODUCTIONS, #329
I exercise regularly. I eat moderate amounts of healthy food. I make sure to get plenty of rest. I see my doctor once a year and my dentist twice a year. I floss every night. I’ve had chest x-rays, cardio stress tests, EKG’s and colonoscopies. I see a psychologist and have a variety of hobbies to reduce stress. I don’t drink. I don’t smoke. I don’t do drugs. I don’t have crazy, reckless sex with strangers.
If Charlie Sheen outlives me, I’m gonna be really pissed.